Everything always seems to come down to money. It's funny, when we lived in Bangladesh the Bengali people would ask us about money all the time. How much did you pay for that? How much money do you make? At first we thought it was weird, but we quickly learned that it wasn't a conversational taboo over there as it is here. Why are Americans so guarded about their money?
I've realized lately how much emphasis I put on money. Looking back to school, we were so determined to make it through college with no loans that we worked crazy hours at multiple jobs, pretty much lived off ramen noodles, hamburger helper and food from the restaurants I worked at, and gave up a lot of time with friends and family. Yes, it's been a blessing to not have to pay student loans, especially over the past year, but that's time and memories that I'll never get back.
Sadly, I think this has been the hardest part for me in this whole fertility thing - money. Insurance didn't cover any tests, procedures or medicines, especially once you've been coded with "Infertility." I even had a claim denied for a strep test! It was reversed and they paid it, but apparently our insurance record is marred for life, and they will question everything from now on to see if they can blame it on our "infertility." It felt like we were constantly choosing to spend ridiculous amounts of money for another test that can either give us a solution or be a waste of money.
We were barely starting to reestablish our savings account when we began the adoption process. Initially I was blown away by the cost of adoption, especially because I had always heard about all these children waiting to be adopted. It didn't take long for me to realize that the children who were waiting to be adopted are five and older and generally come with emotional issues. I felt (and still do feel) guilty, but I wanted a baby. I will admit that I'm selfish, I want all of the experiences from day one.
So, we are adopting privately, through a Christian non-profit agency. A newborn, straight from the hospital. All of the experiences from day one, minus the labor. And that brings us back to money. Private adoption is expensive. I'm applying for grants, petitioning my employer to start an Adoption Assistance Program, and yes, fundraising. This is incredibly difficult for us to let people help, and even more so to ask for money, but we know that we need to humble ourselves and do it.
We haven't decided on our fundraiser(s) yet, but we will be doing something. In no way do we "expect" people to give or participate in our fundraisers, but we will put fundraisers out there in case anyone is interested. I'll post them on here, but I promise not to overwhelm this blog with fundraisers. :) Also, if anyone is in need of baking or tutoring or any other services we can provide for a small donation, we're open to any suggestions!
More than anything, we ask for your prayers through this whole process. Not just for finances, but for our sanity during the waiting time and for the baby that we know was made just for us!
Someone here who adopted did fundraising through amazon. All you had to do was click on their link and i think 5% of the purchase went to them. (some specific items were 15%). Tons of people shop through amazon..i don't know all the details but it might be worth checking into.
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