Peace

It's been so freeing only having two kids.  We can go places that we weren't able to before, I can leave the kids with Troy when I go shopping without feeling guilty, and I can hold both of their hands in public and not worry about one running off.  So when our agency kept asking about us taking another kid, I had mixed feelings.  The convenience was nice, but is that why we're doing this?  Having three kids last winter and spring was really difficult for me... I was often exhausted and frustrated and it made me question myself on a lot of things.  Am I only able to handle two kids?  Or was it a combination of the personalities?  Or was it just the ages of the three kids were too close together and young?  I'm still not sure if the answer and it scares me to find out by trial and error.  But here we are... With a new baby! Troy and I had been talking about it and decided we were going to be very selective with the child we accepted.  I'm still not sure what that means, but we got our first call on Monday afternoon and now have a little boy!  He's four months old and has had a pretty rough life so far.  When I picked him up he had just been released from the hospital with multiple fractures and bruises consistent with abuse.  Reading the file was heart breaking, as well as terrifying.  We have to be extremely careful with his little body, although they think that he'll heal quickly.  It's just devastating that he had to go through that.  He's been a pretty good baby all things considered.  

Keragan and Jia have been very excited to have him here.  Keragan has been a big helper and loves showing people and telling people about her baby brother.  Jia loves to entertain him and he loves to laugh at her silliness and infectious joy.  It's been a crazy few days of figuring out schedules and appointments, but I feel pretty good about where we're at.  

School is also back in session, so Troy and Keragan have been settling into their new routines.  Keragan loves her class and her teacher and wants to carry her backpack everywhere so she's ready for school.  Jia cries each day when we drop her off, as she wants to go too.  The two of them have become best friends and I love seeing them be so close.

I'm still not completely sure what to expect with Jia's case, but I'm being told that she'll be here at least through the end of the year.  We love having her and want her to stay but it's also harder thinking about her leaving the longer she stays.  Especially for Keragan who doesn't remember a time when Jia didn't live with us.  So we do what we can and enjoy having her in our family while she's here!

Please pray for our little boy to heal quickly and completely, both physically and emotionally.  Also pray for us as we figure out the new dynamics and schedules!